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‘Engagement/Wedding’ Category

  1. The Wedding Cake Saga

    October 15, 2005 by Gail

    our wedding cake

    The cake was ivory and the calla lilies were orange (see Hendrik? I don’t hate orange!), but I shot this with film and with the room lighting couldn’t get the colours to come out properly… hence the sepia.

    David never did see the cake (the ceremony was in the Lackawanna Room, the dinner in the Johnson Room), and I didn’t know what to do with it afterwards. The Radisson ended up holding onto it for almost a week, because the cake shop where I bought it didn’t have space. I kept stalling with the hotel because I couldn’t find a home for it — we have a side-by-side fridge/freezer, so it wouldn’t fit. It took a while to find someone with a freezer with the proper dimensions, and that was purely coincidental — our neighbour’s mother decided to get rid of her freezer and had it delivered to her son. My friend Berit had extended her visit from Hamburg to spend time with us after the wedding, and I’m glad she was here to help me transfer it from the Radisson to the neighbour’s house. What a malarkey!

    We’ll break out the cake again when the time’s right.

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  2. Bashful Flower Girl

    October 14, 2005 by Gail

    bashful flower girl
    bashful flower girl

    Melissa, 6, at our wedding dinner at the Radisson – Lackawanna Station. (The ribbon in her hair is actually from the guest gift — she started out wearing a headband with tiny butterflies on it.)

    Melissa behaved very well under the (rather stressful) circumstances. She was a flower girl in her Auntie Ally’s wedding in June of last year, so she’d been there, done that. Also, there were a lot more people at the Maine wedding, so in some ways this one was easier — and she had her Grandmommy and Gumpa all to herself. But seeing Uncle David in a wheelchair and obviously in medical distress must’ve made her a bit frightened. The last time she’d seen Uncle David, he and her daddy had a shared birthday party on May 30. He looked well.

    But Miss Melissa got through the ceremony with no trouble at all. It must’ve been confusing because we were all sitting down instead of standing up. When the minister asked for the wedding rings, she rushed over, handed him the velvet box, then rushed back to her seat. It was a cute moment and I chuckled to myself, but I thought she was very, very brave.

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  3. Debauchery

    October 11, 2005 by Gail

    debauchery

    Obviously a set-up*.

    However, it was the night before my wedding, and it was a hotel room.

    Not my corset, though. More on this later.

    *The closest thing to a still life shot I’ve done in months.

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  4. Wedding Weekend

    October 3, 2005 by Gail

    wedding bouquets

    I should be in bed, I know. But I felt compelled to write a little placeholder post for now. It’s been rather hectic around here, to say the least.

    The good news: IT’S OFFICIAL! WE GOT MARRIED!

    The not-so-good news: David was nauseous and ill in a wheelchair through the ceremony, and was taken to the Emergency Room by his Best Man right after our vows and ring exchange. He was admitted, hooked up to an IV, and has been in the hospital since. David’s in much better shape today, but will remain in the hospital until he’s well enough to go home. More on this later.

    The wedding itself was witnessed by a small group of family and friends, and the whole experience brought many to tears… including me. I was proud of David for soldiering on despite his condition so we could be married on our special day, October 1, exactly one year from the day we met in New York. It was difficult under the circumstances, and it took some time, but I found strength in David’s resolve and we got through the ceremony.

    We are now Mr. and Mrs. Fielding!

    After talking to David, I’ve decided not to post any photos of us because we don’t have any together as husband and wife — David went to the ER right away and there wasn’t an opportunity.

    So, for that and other reasons, I’ll post only select photos of everything else at the wedding and when David’s feeling better we can get dressed up and take proper wedding photos of us then.

    I’ll close for now with our wedding vows, which we’d written ourselves. We’d planned on memorising them, but in the days leading up to the wedding David became too ill, so on the afternoon of the wedding I asked the minister to read them for us and we’d repeat.

    D: I pledge to take you, Gail, as my constant friend, my faithful partner; my wife.
    G: I pledge to take you, David, as my constant friend, my faithful partner; my husband.

    D: I promise that wherever you and I (and Hugh!) are together, that will be home, and I will strive to make it a happy one.
    G: I promise to make our home one of comfort and warmth, for us and for our loved ones.

    D: I promise to support you in your hopes and aspirations, as we continue to grow and learn, and explore all that life has to offer.
    G: I promise to encourage you, and work with you, to help build a future together as a family.

    D: And most of all, I promise to always love you; with all my heart, without reservation or judgement, as endless as the sky.
    G: And I promise to always love you, as yourself, like no other, and to celebrate life by your side.

    (RINGS)

    D: And as a symbol of my pledge, and of our lives being woven together as one, I give you this ring; like you, unique in all the world.
    G: And I give you this ring, like our marriage, created by and for the two of us.

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  5. Taking a Breather

    September 28, 2005 by Gail

    Gumpa’s been slaving away again today in the yard, and it’s looking pretty spiffy. I’ve put one coat of varnish on the dining room chairs (will do the rest next week), and the inside of the house is looking somewhat more respectable. Dad even took a load of stuff to Salvation Army, so things are moving in the right direction, at least.

    David went to Mercy Hospital for his MRIs this afternoon, and he’ll get a phone call from the doctor about the results in the morning before he goes to chemotherapy.

    Tried on the wedding dress again (whew, it still fits), and saw my veil for the first time (it was made in Vancouver after I got here).

    A part of me still finds it hard to believe we’re getting married in just a few days. I wrote my vows the other night, and we went over the program order with the minister this evening.

    I have some cleaning yet to do, then it’s up early to go to New York to pick up Lucy from JFK. Melissa and GMP arrive by car sometime in the evening, so we’ll have a full house tomorrow night.

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  6. Jewish marriage contract (Ketubah)

    September 23, 2005 by Gail

    Jewish marriage contract (Ketubah)

    Water colour and ink on vellum
    Jerusalem or Istanbul, dated 1793-94 (Hebrew calendar 5554)
    Royal Ontario Museum, Toronto

    A Jewish marriage requires a written contract stating the obligations of the husband toward his wife. It also gives the amount of money due to the wife in the event of a divorce.

    This contract states the conditions in the left-hand panel. Both sides were signed by the same three witnesses, using unusual cryptic designs as signatures which could not be imitated easily. One takes the form of a quadruped.

    I took this photo back in early July when I was in Toronto. At the time I was thinking of doing some research on Jewish wedding traditions to see if we could incorporate some elements into our wedding. There was a small exhibit in the Royal Ontario Museum dedicated to Jewish culture, but the lighting made photography more than a little challenging, so I took only a few photos.

    This afternoon our officiating minister and his wife came by to discuss the ceremony and do some planning. David and I had been tossing ideas back and forth last night about our vows that would tie in our original theme (Art Nouveau), and we wanted to run them by Bob and Sue. Maybe I shouldn’t get too detailed at this point — we want to keep it a surprise and some attendees will be reading this — but suffice to say the spirit of conventional wedding vows remains intact, but the form they take will differ. Vague, I know, but I’ll publish the vows after the wedding and all will be revealed. I’ve never seen anyone do it this way, but as soon as the idea materialised in my head I knew I wanted to do it.

    This afternoon’s meeting was very productive: we formulated a basic order of proceedings, timing, etc. There will only be 16 people attending in total, so the atmosphere will be much more intimate than with the original numbers of guests.

    Today I spoke to my dad and he said their flight yesterday went smoothly, so all’s well on the home front in Maine. Dad and Melissa flew from Vancouver shortly after 8am, stopped for a few hours in Minneapolis, and arrived in Boston, where they were greeted by GMP (Jean), the one-lady welcoming committee. A little birdie told me Dad drove part of the way home because he wanted to test drive the PT Cruiser. Shameless!

    I’ll see my dad on Sunday night, when he arrives in Scranton nearly 12 hours after leaving Maine. It sounds rather cruel to subject him to such a long bus ride after a long flight from Vancouver to Boston, but my objective was to send him point-to-point. Best to keep things simple, especially when everything else… isn’t.

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  7. Licensed to Wed

    September 14, 2005 by Gail

    Civil War Monument
    Courthouse Square, Scranton

    After David’s first modified radiation treatment this morning, we took care of the most important errand of the day: getting our marriage license. (Or licence, if I were still in BC.)

    We parked at Courthouse Square, which was buzzing with lunchtime activity. Inside, after a security check, we found the Marriage Licensing office on the third floor amidst what appeared to be ongoing renovation — cables were hanging out of the ceiling.

    All our paperwork was in order, but it took the clerk twice as long to enter my information versus David’s… I had to spell everything out:

    Birthplace: Zamboanga del Sur, Philippines

    She couldn’t get that to fit in one field. The other fields, which included my parents’ birthplaces and occupations, were equally long and had to be spelled out.

    Then there was the section on previous marriages, which gave pause. Click, click, click.

    But the one question the clerk asked that really stopped the show was:

    “Are you related in any way?”

    We had to laugh! She looked a bit sheepish asking us after entering in data from the Philippines and Canada, but we knew she was required by law to ask the question.

    “What’s the restriction for relation, anyway?” I asked.

    “You can’t marry your first cousin, but second cousin is OK,” she responded. “It’s different in every state. In New York, for example, you can marry your first cousin.”

    We were incredulous. “Really!”

    “Oh yes, there are all sorts of combinations… they should really use a family tree to make it easier to show instead of having to read it all out.”

    David and I were discussing this prospect when I turned to the clerk and asked her if close relatives actually come in to try to get a marriage license.

    “Oh yes,” she said earnestly. “All the time!”

    *cue music from Deliverance*

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  8. The Wedding Update

    September 7, 2005 by Gail

    In case anyone is wondering, the wedding is still on for October 1, but scaled down and modified to make things easier for us.

    I moved the venue from the Tripp House to the Radisson – Lackawanna Station.
    - it’s a beautiful and historic building
    - it’s near the house
    - if David feels tired, he can rest upstairs (Tripp House doesn’t have sleeping rooms)
    - I don’t have to deal with food & beverage vendors
    - the restaurant (Carmen’s) has a good reputation
    - I don’t have to decorate

    We’re only having a fraction of people we’d originally planned for — David’s immunity is too low. Some family members and friends in the wedding party, plus some friends from Europe who’d already made plans to come. Maybe 15 of us in total.

    There will only be a short ceremony, followed immediately by a dinner. No reception, no formalwear, no wedding cake, no photographer. That will all be saved for next year, whenever David’s feeling well again.

    We’re postponing our planned honeymoon to Europe until after next year’s receptions. For now, I’m looking for something along the lines of a scenic rail trip on the East Coast. Historic. The autumn foliage would look fantastic from an old train, but I haven’t found anything suitable yet. Suggestions/recommendations most welcome!

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  9. The Saga Continues

    August 24, 2005 by Gail

    The past few days have been to-and-fro, so herein lies a summary.

    First of all, Breigh is wondering where her package went, and so are we. Today marks the FIFTH day that David and I have tried to track it down. I was unsuccessful Saturday and Sunday, David inquired on Monday, I navigated the intestinal corridors yesterday and came up empty-handed, then David returned again today:

    New Schedule and Purloined Package

    We don’t understand why it’s been so difficult to track down this package. Volumes of mail and such come into the hospital, are we just the victims of bad luck here? Or, does efficiency and organisation not reach subterranean levels? (The mail room/receiving department is in a corner of a maze that is the basement.)

    David made contact with the manager this afternoon, who says he’s investigating. At least David found out who T. Lydon is — it’s a guy in the mail room, not a nurse. I think nurses have more sense!

    In other news:

    Monday

    - called some friends in Europe in the morning
    - decided to scale down the wedding
    - decided to cancel the receptions here and in Vancouver
    - will try and book hotel closer to the house for a small ceremony and dinner Oct 1
    - drove David to radiologist to they could mark up his body
    - futile trip to the hospital #3 (for package)
    - David’s appetite finally kicks in after I tempt him with lunch at Circle’s in Wilkes-Barre
    - we go to David’s office for the first time after his diagnosis
    - we talk to our immigration lawyer about my visa issues
    - we try and boost our spirits with the bodacious-as-ever Margaret Cho performing her latest show Revolution on Netflix DVD.

    Tuesday

    - futile trip to the hospital #4
    - I enter the time warp that is the Coney Island Texas Weiner lunch counter
    - stop in at the Radisson – Lackawanna Station to try and book a small room for our scaled-down wedding ceremony and dinner
    - e-mailed vendors in Vancouver to cancel October 8 reception, and try to hold onto our deposits to book next year
    - David’s radiologist warns: ‘No spicy food, no alcohol’, so I make him tandoori chicken
    - our comic relief via Netflix continues, with Jerry Seinfeld’s documentary, Comedian.

    Wednesday

    - a morning phone call from the radiologist requests us to come in today instead of Friday for radiation equipment prep, radiation begins early tomorrow morning instead of Monday
    - futile visit to the hospital #5, but this time a manager is involved
    - I go to Wegman’s to get *REAL FOOD* (fresh lychees, longans, wasabi peas, brown basmati rice, Summerfresh humus, crystallized ginger, ginger tea, all-natural ginger beer, all-natural raspberry ginger beer, goat cheese, and more…)
    - we receive cute pre-school artwork from the M’s via the post
    - we’re both tired, and have to be up early… can we make it through the documentary Fog of War without falling asleep?

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  10. The Wedding Rings Make an Appearance in Our Time of Need

    August 17, 2005 by Gail

    the wedding rings, at Mercy Hospital

    the wedding rings, at Mercy Hospital

    We’re supposed to get married in six weeks, but I think this is as good a time as any to wear our wedding rings.

    David designed them himself, using the stones from his late grandmother’s ring (which holds both her wedding and engagement stones, plus his mother’s, 7 in all). They bring us familial comfort while David is in the hospital having chemotherapy and extensive testing done (bone and brain scans, etc.). This is a critical time, as this type of cancer has an alarming rate of spread and early treatment will make all the difference in the world.

    We were assigned the best oncologist in the area (thank you FV for your referral), and we both felt utmost relief at how quickly the doctor secured a bed for David. I feel so much better knowing that David is getting immediate attention, but of course at the same time it’s unnerving because the urgency means he’s under very serious threat of cancer spreading to other parts of his body. In the seven days between the biopsy, the diagnosis, and the visit with the oncologist, David’s symptoms intensified and until today he’s only been treated with over-the-counter and prescription medicine to alleviate the pain. At least now he’s getting therapy to shrink the tumour and not just painkillers. At the oncologist’s office we were briefed by a nurse on chemotherapy and what types David will be given, I was given a booklet on chemotherapy, and also a book about lung cancer. The oncologist was everything we could expect in a specialist and we have confidence from our meeting with him (and other sources) that David is getting the best care possible.

    For his workmates and other friends reading this site who are local to northeastern Pennsylvania, David is in Room 920 (9th Floor) until Friday or Saturday if you have time to visit (visiting hours are until 8:30pm):

    Mercy Hospital Scranton
    746 Jefferson Ave
    Scranton, Pennsylvania 18501
    T: 570-348-7100

    David has a private room with a telephone, but he also has his mobile phone if you’d like to call him. He can also read e-mail on his phone. If you’d like to send an e-mail, it’s his full name with no spaces at verizon dot net (to avoid spambots). I’ll be in and out of the hospital every day, but I’ll take photos and post updates when I can.

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