For those of my friends who are familiar with who “the doctor” is because I’ve mentioned him before, here is the verdict as of Friday, November 21, 2003:

New York Newsday.com: Cardiologist acquitted on charges of sexually molesting patient

**I don’t want to post his name because if I did, anyone who does a Google search on his name will bring up this page.** But it’s all over the articles (many of them are pretty trashy, due to the nature of the case, especially the New York Post). Here are more:

New York Daily News: Doc cleared in lesbian grope case
New York Daily News: Teased grope doc? No way, she’s gay
New York Post: ‘Dirty Doc’ Slam
New York Post: ‘Breast-kissing’ Doc Acquitted
New York Blade: Gay gal foils accused groper’s claims

Upon seeing the photos, I am amazed. He’s 48 years old and looks exactly the same, even after nearly 13 years. He’s like a walking advertisement for what heli-skiing, squash, and the gym will do for you. [Eliza, I told you he looked like Matt Lauer...]

How do I feel about the case? Somewhat conflicted. Did I think he was guilty? I thought something might have happened, but I didn’t think he would be so foolish as to:

1) not have a nurse present during the examination
2) do anything that would jeopardize his vocation

I’ve been following this case since the spring, when I stumbled upon the news of the arrest in February at the website of the District Attorney’s Office - Manhattan. What a shocker!! I even phoned the DA’s office to find out the verdict, but it kept getting postponed. First it was July, then on and on. I kept checking the DA’s website. According to the news reports on the case months ago, he was found not guilty of forcible touching, a misdemeanor. He faced up to a year in jail if he had been convicted, but he was charged on three counts in total. What he did admit to was “inappropriate behaviour,” saying that she initiated the activity and it was consensual, but he denied most of her allegations (lurid details in the articles). Apparently, a month after the incident on Jan 6, she was wire tapped by the police and went to meet him at the Harvard Club on Feb 6. There they had a conversation that was secretly recorded and they discussed what took place. The jury rejected the claim by the woman after three days of deliberation and the doctor was acquitted.

In one article, it says, “The jury apparently did not find the patient’s testimony credible. Members of the panel did not know [he] was convicted of harassment after a similar incident with a nurse in 1997.” It also mentions in the articles that the jury was given information by the defense attorney that the woman was litigious, having filed 6 lawsuits in 10 years, four of them auto-related. However, the jury was not informed about the doctor’s court history. Why didn’t the prosecuting attorney bring this to the table? Did he not think the defense attorney would bring up her court records? Makes you wonder.

In the New York Daily News: “The woman said she believed it was unfair that the jury had heard about her lawsuits, four of which involved auto accidents, but did not learn that [he] had pleaded guilty in 1997 to harassment after he grabbed a nurse in an elevator at Weill Cornell Medical Center and started kissing and fondling her.”

I think this last piece of news might’ve made the jury think further about the credibility of the defendant as well as the claimant, but then again, maybe not, I don’t know. The doctor was more than foolish for trying something with a patient, but to try something that might land him in court for a second time (and he pleaded guilty to the charge with the nurse!) and put everything at risk is unbelievable. He’s just asking to get thrown in jail.

I’ve been tempted to phone him since the spring to ask him point-blank about the details of the case, but decided against it. I figured I would wait for a verdict. Just before I went to New York for New Year’s, only days before this incident took place, I mentioned to a friend that I was considering calling up the doctor, but my friend strongly advised against it. He said, “Take it from me, because I’m a guy. If you have no intention of actually meeting with him, then don’t call.” I didn’t, as I could see his point. I almost met up with him (the doctor) when I was in NYC exactly three years ago. I was walking through Central Park one night shortly after American Thanksgiving, and suddenly his name popped into my head. I’d been in touch with him on and off for probably four years, so the name was not difficult to remember, but I hadn’t spoken to him since settling in Vancouver, and I hadn’t seen him since 1991. There are 12 million people in Manhattan (and Jewish doctors are a dime a dozen, aren’t they?), but I was feeling bold and phoned directory assistance… I was able to get the number of his private practice and left a message. I was somewhat surprised he’d remember me after all this time, but I must’ve made an impression as he phoned me back. After some catch-up conversation, we’d tentatively arranged to meet. I was short on time, so in the end I told him I couldn’t. But we exchanged phone numbers, and he suggested I take a train and meet him during a ski-trip to Golden (near the BC/Alberta border) in February. I haven’t spoken to him since.

Anyway, now that the verdict is in, I’m tempted again to phone him, but the inclination hasn’t been strong enough to do it yet. We shall see. I wouldn’t expect him to talk in detail about the case, but at the same time I am very interested to know what really happened.

Another one of Ananova’s quirkies:

Ananova - Swedes told to beware drunk and disorderly elks

Steve F. sent me a piece of philosophy this morning. Steve’s a very easygoing guy and played bass in the jazz trio I hired for the party last Saturday night. My brother’s known him for yonks and I knew I could depend on him to deliver that night. I’m also very glad they were there as we discovered the hotel’s mixer not working after the program started (it was working when we tested it at the beginning!), so I had to use their microphone.

Anyway, here’s the article Steve sent: The Tao of Fish Swimming

One of things I’m still recovering from is being an MC! I’m usually the unofficial photographer at events… I run around with my camera and am happy to stay in the background. Last Saturday I lost all feeling to my limbs as I stood in front of over 100 people as the Program Director and was up front and centre for over three hours. Kevin gave me a hand with things as I was running around and announced a few of the speakers for the evening, so I wasn’t the only one doing it. But I designed the program (printing it was a bit of a nightmare, but everyone liked what I’d done with it), and I was the one who had contacted all the speakers, so handing the emceeing job over to someone else would’ve meant I still would have to brief that person on everything. At the end of the evening I was totally surprised when Kevin took the microphone and introduced me, holding a big bouquet of flowers and a gift bag… was I ever stunned! Then I was totally speechless as the entire ballroom of people gave me a standing ovation… no wonder I’ve been feeling somewhat disoriented all week. Being in charge and being in the public eye for an entire evening made my head spin.

I was going to drive down to San Francisco after Christmas to visit Eric and family (Rob will be there, too!). Eric just relocated to the Bay Area to be the CFO of Banana Republic. But I decided not to go anywhere for this Christmas break so I could devote my time to looking after Michael and Maddy while Cheryl is on total bedrest and Allan is working. Eliza isn’t going anywhere, either, while Jason will be East and Kristin is back in Switzerland for Christmas, so at least I can hang out with Eliza when I’m not with the M’s… I can catch up on film!

… a day that continued from Wednesday with no rest for the wicked — I pulled an all-nighter trying to finish that bleedin’ CMS paper, but next thing I knew it was 6:45am and Eliza had rolled up in her little yellow Mercedes SLK and it was time to go to the office. What a day.

I am officially an SFU delinquent who must be made to stand nose against the wall for not handing in a paper on time and possibly losing full marks for it (30%). Normally I would be frantic but my brain just hasn’t recovered from all the abuse recently and is refusing to co-operate right now, anyway, after not having had any sleep since Tuesday night.

‘Night ‘Night

… has been incredibly good. Some of the e-mail:

“Thanks for hosting a superb party for Ross and Lee on Saturday night. I enjoyed myself thoroughly and I think that the guests of honour were very pleased to be feted in this manner. You did a great job.”

“A big THANK YOU to you, for a wonderful evening on Sat., and all your careful and thoughtful planning and preparations. You did a great job, and I’m sure everyone enjoyed it as we did. It was so appropriate to honor such an honorable pair.”

“What a wonderful event last Saturday! Your tremendous efforts paid off beautifully. Lee and Ross were certainly overwhelmed with joy and love. Just fabulous.”

There’s a fair amount of follow-up, though, and I’ve been sorting out the hotel bills, the money received, and other expenses. Wow, I don’t think I’ll be tackling anything quite like this for some time. If only I didn’t have much else going on at the same time.

How ironic is it that I can’t finish a Communications paper because I’m too busy… communicating!

watching the antics

with Kevin

I didn’t take any photos during the event, but Claire and Al did, and Claire sent over a few of the photos this morning. There was just so much going on that it’s going to take me weeks to piece it all together. In any case, Ross and Lee were so overwhelmed about the whole affair, and so happy and emotional and amused all at the same time, that it was worth every moment of the planning to pull this whole thing off.

cutting Jane’s cake

It’s hard to tell from this photo because it’s a bit far away, but the cake is designed to look like cross-sections of a tree, and there are chocolate leaves on top. How clever! Their daughter, Jane, made it and she makes the most amazing cakes. The funny part is that she gave them a hatchet to cut it with, too!

Wow. What a party! It was ONE BIG BRAIN RUSH… totally surreal… *although that might be related to only having 2 hours of sleep*… and I cannot believe I missed the moment when Ross and Lee came out of the elevators and saw over a hundred of their friends standing in front of them! Kevin went up the elevator to get them, and I was doing something, so I told him I’d be up in a minute. Then when I was ready to go up I found that I needed a card… by the time I got a card and went upstairs, they had already gone downstairs! While I was in the elevator, I heard shrieking and carrying on, and I knew I’d missed it…

I’ll just have to watch the video!

I’m really glad I got my dad and Sophia there to see it all unfold, because I think now they have a better idea of what I do and who I work with. When you spend all week with people (or in my case in the past few years, see them once a week but talk to them all week) you end up seeing them more often than your own parents. A few months ago my dad asked me what my company did and what I do, and I told them about the retirement party. My dad said he wanted to come! I said, ‘hey you won’t know anybody’ and later thought it really WOULD be a good idea for him to meet my employers and see who I spend so much time with. I believe now he has a much better sense of me.

This Communications Paper is gonna be late… can’t make the post office deadline. I’ve been flat out this week so the coursework will be compromised. But I’m looking forward to the party — I am dying for more fun and less work, even though the party will still be lots of work. I’m emceeing, and I’m a bit nervous about it since I’ve never done it before!! I’ve been working some jokes in my head and ways to announce people and trying to figure out if I forgot anything. I still have lots to do on it, like the program and more scanning and printing and making videoclips… yikes… gotta go to the office tomorrow…

Finish the paper first.

I’m still haggling with the hotel. I’m a pretty good deal-finder, but I can’t say I’m a great deal-maker. I give in too quickly. My dad’s good at bargaining, it comes with being from a country where you have to haggle for EVERYTHING. My dad still continues the practice in Canada — he’ll even try to get the Canadian Tire guy to come down in price. Me, I look at tags and if I don’t like what I see, I just don’t buy it.

Confirmed another speaker today (what a character that guy is), and received the Pogo poster from the U.S. that I’d ordered. Now all I have to do is frame it. For a background on this poster, I copied the words below from the site http://www.igopogo.com/

(Walt Kelly first used the quote “We Have Met The Enemy and He Is Us” on this poster for Earth Day in 1970.)

From the foreword to The Pogo Papers, Copyright 1952-53

“The publishers of this book, phrenologists of note, have laid hands upon the author’s head and report the following vibrations:

Herein can be found that rare native tree, the Presidential Timber, struck down in mid-sprout by the jawbone of a politician. Pogo returns to the swamp from a couple of political conventions to find his unfinished business being rapidly finished, once and for all, by rough and ready hands.

With that much information you are about as well equipped as anybody to plunge into the still waters of the Okefenokee Swamp, home of the Pogo people. The activities in this present book were spread shamelessly over the past drought-ridden year. Looking back across the fertilizer, small shafts of green can be seen here and there, while off in the distance wisps of smoke denote the harvesters at work.

Some nature lovers may inquire as to the identity of a few creatures here portrayed. On this point field workers are in some dispute.

Specializations and markings of individuals everywhere abound in such profusion that major idiosyncracies can be properly ascribed to the mass*. Traces of nobility, gentleness and courage persist in all people, do what we will to stamp out the trend. So, too, do those characteristics which are ugly. It is just unfortunate that in the clumsy hands of a cartoonist all traits become ridiculous, leading to a certain amount of self-conscious expostulation and the desire to join battle.

There is no need to sally forth, for it remains true that those things which make us human are, curiously enough, always close at hand. Resolve then, that on this very ground, with small flags waving and tinny blast on tiny trumpets, we shall meet the enemy, and not only may he be ours, he may be us.

The phone was ringing off the hook today. I was on the phone for so long that it died by 5pm, I had to use my mobile phone to make calls.